5 Reasons stories with lists suck

1. Information from the Reformation about why Flax should be duty free.
I know, Rich People Suck. Barter with gold then, what the fuck do you want me to do about it. Counterpoint,

2. Boring insipid esoteric and tenuously linked facts this list supposedly supports in its tagline.
Mortgage backed securities Mortgage backed securities. Yeah right. Anything you ever hear more than once is probably not accurate, especially in lists stories. They stole people’s pensions. Now that is accurate.

3. A graph of dubious importance showing eclectic free-association of spurious notions asserted by writer requiring reliance on creative genius of reader.
As this chart shows, irregardless of Gum, Television, Internet, Ipods, Downloads, Video Games, Cigarettes, Coffee, Cheeseburgers, Blogs, Alcohol, Prozac, Baseball Caps, Cars, Cancer, Wrestling, Marijuana, Flu Viruses, Condoms, Ibuprofen, Sex, or Heart Attacks, 1 in 4 million Acorns will grow into an Oak Tree.

4. A picture of whimsical/genuflective position of writer about the lists.

5. Add-on afterthought or repackaged restatement of previous entries made to make you wade through the advertising feces filling up the website by clicking on the next page.