Breaking Story?

By Orange Roof Reporter

Typical accommodations of our Reporters (undated file photo)

The story, according to unnamed sources, cannot be told about without compromising government security. This story revolves around certain countries and a number of people. The exact times and events that transpired cannot be legally exposed, and your Orange-Roof Journalist here would never go against the dictates of security in our glorious state. We can say this much: something happened somewhere, and as a Journalist it is imperative that a free people know that at this unknown place, some human being(s), who shall be kept unidentified, did some unspecified acts in some sort of referential time frame. The Orange roof reporter here is bound by secrecy to not say whether this imbroglio is shocking, uplifting or merely skak, though we can definitely report that it occurred. It is probably a single time instance of the thing, although, most readers should leave open the possibility that it may be an evolving situation. If legally allowed, your Orange Roof Reporter will keep you abreast of the changing situation, if it is indeed changing, or if there is some resolve to the problem, if, indeed, it is a problem, which I am limited to reporting specifically on, for reasons that I will leave the reader to speculate. All we can say about this story for now is stay tuned.

Return of the Muses

Strunk and White, Chapter 4

Bad gramer, is you're nemeses. Making sense in the present tense needs to accomplished if you want you're audience impressing. Does it fit you're topic? Writing a book, or a pargraph, or a sentence needs the syntact to fit the essence of the idea. Otherwise your juggling wine bottles and fresh ham. Use the mind to divine the comma not the mind to divine the comma. Forget a narrator if you are talking in the first person, I am, the narrator. I be narration. See, it is simple to write affective prose when all the cylinders, metaphorically, click like a drum. Lt's take a look at this sentence; Punctuation is your frenemy. Is it an interesting addendum to the discussion of good gramer, or is it annoying distraction. You are the judge * You are the Jury. All roads lead to Venice should be your Mantra. Verbs do not care. Carry that with you, run with it and remember it. Nouns know better than adjectives what the succinctly ordinate roundish glimmering jibe means. As Samuel Clemens once said, “It ain't you Huck, it's me.”

The paragraph walked out the door. Flash, boom bang. Be the vowels. Public speaking can a very stress inducing experience, and the prepared writer will pepper-spray the audience with amusing anecdotes of the time they missed the bus going to Albany. Just keep at it and the pieces will fall into place and you can leave the listener under the spell of your ideas being literally transcendent of the moment and relieving, for a moment perhaps, the inconsequential pain and worry of thumbing to Albany.

While technically accurate, putting the pen to paper can be daunting, at best. Allowing the willow to somberly wave in the breeze prepares your audience for the next stanza. Good gramer is always your best bet, especially if the ideas are ridiculous..